Wut.

 

Some staff and others have informed me about the intriguing events that are unfolding for the seniors at United Township this year.  Apparently the principal decided to prohibit grinding at the dance.  Because of this, a group of students have decided to host their own "anti-prom" at another location, in which grinding would be allowed.

This leads me to question the purpose of a prom in general.  Is it to more or less engage in frottage on a dance floor in front of everyone with your significant other, or does it still hold some of those traditional aspects?

To me, this just seems stupid.  I could just see all these kids freaking out, texting each other: OMG, we cnt grind? WTF.  And they're right.  How dare the school decide such interactions, at an event hosted by the school, are inappropriate.  This is 'Murica and we won't accept this.  Just kidding.  Of course.

I think that's one of the reasons I never went to high school dances.  I just didn't prefer seeing one of my good friends humped by some random dude from behind.  Besides that, it was just steamy, smelly, and gross, when I'd attended a Homecoming dance.  I didn't pay $20 to see a bunch of awkward interactions that, well, let's just say if the girls' fathers were around, there'd be a couple misfires out of some 12-gauges.

Beyond that, I just can't fathom the immaturity or the naive thought processes going through some of these kids' minds.  You're so concerned about grinding that you'll seriously go out of your way to host your own prom?  That's just... absurd.  Here's a picture describing exactly how I feel.



 

So, yeah.  It's not like you guys can't do that crap on your own time in your cars or rooms or wherever you run off to.  And I'm only trying to figure out the rationale behind any motivation to do this.  And I don't care if you guys all hate me after reading this and decide to DDoS my webpage.  However, I don't think the majority of thinkers behind this event know what that is, so it's all good.  I'm not worried.  Come at me, bro.

I guess I can't tell you all what to do.  But with every passing day, I lose more and more hope in my generation.

I used to have some good friends who I never thought would swear, drink, make-out with random guys, or party... and they've done all the above and more.  And what's the big deal with getting wasted with friends, anyway?  I understand an occasional drink to relax or loosen up or whatever.  But do you really need to get so smashed that you need like ten aspirin to get through the following day?  I'll admit, I'm not perfect and I've partied, drank, and all that nonsense... but at least I woke up and realized that it was a waste of my time and energy.  And maybe you all have decided you don't need weed or a keg to be happy.

And there will be those of you who are all like, "I do what I want, sucka."

Whatever.

And if you're so much better and all that jazz, then I dare you to not drink this prom.  I remember when my girlfriend got home from the Project Prom thingy or whatever they called it.  The police, coroner, and school organized a program that would explain the consequences of drunk driving and bad choices a lot of kids make on prom night.  During the dramatized reenactment of a car accident, and some of the stories told by parents or family who had lost loved ones due to such bad choices, these kids were giggling.

Grow up.  And this means nothing to a lot of you.  A lot of you won't even read this all the way through because you think I'm just some tard who thinks he knows better.  And maybe I do.  And maybe you don't know everything, quite yet.

And I'm calling you "kids" for a reason.  (I do understand that some readers are not these "kids," and some may even be victims of their... immaturity, silliness... etc.)  Because you guys are supposed to be seniors, graduating and becoming young adults, and the fact that grinding isn't allowed at school event destroys your entire world.

There are just a lot more larger issues going on then the prohibition of grinding at prom.  It's really not that big of a deal. I also recall that when I went to my one and only high school dance, I was more concerned about the food at the restaurant, then the actual dance itself.

LOL.  That's all I gotta say, after face-palming.  This better be some troll prank or something, or I'm really about to invest in a space rocket, fire myself off to the nearest planet that supports human life, and start my own colony.  You wouldn't like it because I probably wouldn't allow grinding, either.